OH! MY ACHING HEAD!

CHOWDER HEAD and I PIE didn't leave untill about 1am last night. Next week I'm going to invite her over Sunday, get her totally wasted, then go to bed.. She's right, I do hate her this morning...

Oh Dear sweet CHOWDER HEAD

Last night CHOWDER HEAD and I catered at a Summer Solstice party. It's kinda dead, so we get off on the early side.(12am) We have a couple drinks upstairs and decide to head home. On the way home we stop off at the Eagle River Bowling Alley to have a drink and relieve our bladders.
It's a wild night for bowlers.
The bar is full of drunks, and they are all singing Kareoke.(sp?) Well, get a few drinks in me and I have to sing a song. They call my name, and I proceed to belt out my best rendition of, "Ruby Don't Take Your Love to Town".... In the middle of the song CHOWDER HEAD comes up and starts cheering me on. I mean actually CHEERING. Stuff like, "GO SOGS! YOU CAN DO IT!COMMON PUT YOUR HEART IN IT!" etc....
I get done and run back to the bar.. I'm ready to call it a night. CHOWDER HEAD comes back to the bar and tells me:
"I really liked that song,so I signed you up to sing a few more"

WHY??????!

Why am I the only one that blogs anymore? I feel so lonely and neglected. I blame you F.JIM. I expect you to go to CHOWDER HEAD's house at least once a week and gather fodder for this damn blog. DO YOUR PART DAMN IT!

That Mother Fucker!

About a week ago my car broke down. It started squeeling, the power steering went out, and it over heated. It's been sitting at my work and I've been driving my cute b.f.'s truck.. No problem.. This week I decide that I should probably be proactive and look into getting it fixed.
I call up a guy that has done work on my car before. Changed my breaks, oil etc.. Now, this guy isin't some Joe-Blow that I don't know either. He's the brother from another mother of a very good friend of mine. He apparently doesn't have a car and suggests that (since I shouldn't be driving my car) that I come pick him up, and he'll just fix it at my work. GREAT, I can do that!
He tells me it shouldn't take more than 20 or so minutes and wthat it won't cost me more than $15.00 or $20.00..GREAT, this is a fucking deal!!
SO.... After a very long day at work yesterday I drive (in traffic @5pm) across town to pick him up. He tells me the total cost will be $80.00... "That's including the cost of the belt", He assures me.
I'm like......hmm... OK. This is a guy I want to give my money AND my business too.. I suppose if he wants to make $50.00 for doing this I shouldn't really mind paying him that. If this is the only thing I really have to do to get it fixed I will go ahead and pay it.
Well, OF COURSE! there is something else going on. He puts on the belt, it doesn't work, so now he wants me to have my car towed over to his shop so he can look at it further. He doesn't have a tow truck, but he can recommend another, "really good guy" to come and pick it up for me for right around $50.00.

The cincher is that he thinks I'm a fucking idiot. You see I'm not some dumb bitch that doesn't do her research. I called around BEFORE I even called him and found out the cost of this fucking belt and how much it would cost me *aprox* to get this problem fixed. (which, BTW is $32.99-$36.99, for the belt for us normal folk walking into Schucks requesting it)
I drive him BACK to the fucking shop, drop him off, he gives me the name of the guy and says he'll look for my car tomorrow..
Last night I couldn't sleep cause I keep mulling it over in my mind. I'm tossing and turning trying to figure out a way that I can diplomatically explain to this guy that I think he over charged me.
I get to work this morning and give him a call.... This is how the conversation went:
ME: Hey, Joe Blow. I've been thinking about this all night. You told me that you would only charge me $15.00 or $20.00 bucks to put that belt on. BTW, How much did you spend specifically on the belt? JOEBLOW: OH.. uhh.... $50.00...... You know it goes all the way around the engine... It keeps all that stuff running.... **** It's a fucking Serpintine belt, like I have no idea how a fucking engine works*****
ME: HUH. You sure did get ripped off. I called Schucks and they told me it only cost $32.99.
JOEBLOW: Well, you know some times I get deals .. Sometimes I don't...What do you want me to do?
ME: FUCK THIS

I guess what it is, is the whole principle of the thing. He tells me one thing and then once it all goes down, he shits all over me.. When I called him back AGAIN and told him AGAIN that I thought I was getting screwed.. he says to me that his shop (this is HIS business BTW) charges $50.00 for the belt.. And why am I bitching at him for charging $30.00 (labor)?? He's gotta make a buck some where...AND he took time out of HIS day to come and "do me a favor".. *** If it were legal to kill, he just made my ficking list****
I mean, I guess it meant nothing to him that I spent aprox..$20-$30.00 in gas to pick his sorry ass up (in fucking traffic).. He was a fucking DICK to me from the moment he found out that I was driving my B.F.'s truck..( I mean I know he harbors a secret desire to fuck me and by fixing my car he hopes someday I'll let him) AND I grossly over paid him to do a job that I could and should have just done my self.
(I don't like getting dirty)
NOt to mention the fact that I OFFERED to buy the fucking belt MYSELF and just pay him the labor..
But NO. He assured me it would be no trouble for him to get it.
(Which I must reitterate) he told me my would be $15-$20.00 dollars for labor + the cost of the belt.
Well.. Needless to say. I called back one of the shops I had spoken with earlier.. They immediatly came to tow my truck..(at no charge) and they will be fixing the problem.
At that point I decided I would go and cancle the check I gave him, but NOOOOOoo.. He had already cashed it! Big fucking surprize there, eh?
For someone with NO CAR he sure got him self to the bank in a big hurry..
Ah well.. It just goes to show..
Don't EVER do business with friends... Cause when it's good, it's good..But when it's bad, it's REALLLLL bad..

How did I ever get along?

I am a direct result of the Anchorage School District..
I blame them for my continual misspelling of the word "THEIR"... And also for any other misspellings that happen to be.

AS THE CHOWDER HEAD TURNS

CAMPING Day 3: Everyone wakes up to a bright sunny day. We are all properly hung over and ready for another day of fun and frivolity. No sign of CHOWDER HEAD yet....
Breakfast is cooked and the beer drinking comences. The keg was finished off the day before, so we must rely on what's left of the cheap canned beer and the other booze to keep our weekend buzz going...
CHOWDER HEAD stumbles out of bed eventually, nursing her sore lip and head with some coffee and Kaluah. (I would have added a little Brandy.....but that's just me.)
The day progresses and as night aproaches the kids head for thier tents.
CHOWDER HEAD seems to have recovered nicely and discovered a second wind. Tonight she is more determined than ever to see a little flesh. Over all this has been a disappointing weekend for her. So far she has only seen a few penis's and a flash or two from me.
Her eyes are starting to cross and she's out for blood. Thinking she might inspire, she rips her shirt off and does her streaking.
The next most fucked up person..(beyond CHOWDER HEAD) is FEMALE JIM's CUTE NEW B.F... He has never been camping with this crew, so little does he know what to expect. CHOWDER HEAD zones in on him and starts...
"F.JIM's C.N.B.F.! Get your clothes off! You have to run around the fire naked! DO IT!!"
Now, F.JIM's C.N.B.F. is FUCKED UP. He can barley evenspeak let alone stand up. But, CHOWDER HEAD shows no mercy. She can smell her victim and is going in for the kill.
She starts chanting, "C.N.B.F.! C.N.B.F.! C.N.B.F.!"
Well... He really has no choice now does he?
SISTA's B.F. has joined in on the chanting and I've gotten my camera out.
F.JIM's C.N.B.F. has taken the bait. He rips off his shirt and proceeds to run/stumble his way around the fire.
This gets everyone going, especially CHOWDER HEAD.
The next thing we know IPIE has taken off all his clothes and is streaking too.
Things are starting to get a little roudy at this point.
F.JIM's C.N.B.F.'s jaunt around thefire seems to have put him over the edge. He tries to stand up and falls on his face. ...........*** I really can't tell you how little T.V. is needed with this group.
F.JIM helps him to bed....He's totally fucked up! On the way there he yells out, "HEY! I'm with her!!!" **refering to F.JIM***
I can't resist harrassing a drunkard and follow them to thier tent. I over hear him lamenting to F.JIM..... (in slurred drunk speak)"OH my god! I'm So fricken waisted! I can never come back here. I made a total fool of my self"
All I can do is laugh and remind him to take a look at CHOWDER HEAD and her rambunctious behavior.
Needless to say...I get back to the fire and CHOWDER HEAD has new recruits..Every girl left standing has removed thier tops and is running around the fire.
I didn't stand a chance.