Corn

I love corn. I eat it out of the can several times per week. It's not just that I love the taste of corn, however. Corn is by far the funniest food. Funny, you ask? Yes, funny. This morning I got up at an unfortunate level 0 (long story, will make up for it tonight). Had a cup of coffee and a cig. ***Do you know where I am going with this now?*** Inevitably, the POOP needs to happen. There is something about a cup of coffee and a cig that makes ya gotta poo. I dash to sit on my throne, and do my doo. There is something different about this poo. I can tell. I know the feeling. I start to giggle before I even look. I am excited. Where's my damn camera? Is my MONSTER awake to share? I wipe.....taking my time.....building up to the moment. I slowly pull up my jammy bottoms. A bead of sweat has formed on my brow. The anticipation is killing me. With butterflies in my stomach I slowly turn around......and I look. Floating around the bowl are several pieces of CORN, looking as if they were never digested (I can never figure how that happens as I do chew my food). I gazed at my creation for only a few seconds (who wants to stand there in the stench of their own crap?) I flushed and walked away with a victorious feeling and splash of self confidence. I love corn.