VOICES...........

I woke up this morning to three voices arguing in my head.

Voice #1 Stay in Bed, FEMALE JIM. Call in sick to work today. They don’t need you it’s the slow season.

Voice #2 FEMALE JIM, get your Ass out of bed. You’re going to be late for work.

Voice #3 Kill CHOWDER HEAD

Yes this is how I wake up the every Friday morning for the past month. Well since CHOWDER HEAD and her husband decided to take fencing lessons and dubbed me to watch their kids on Thursday evenings. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy the kids. It’s what comes after that always makes Friday mornings undesirable.
In walk CHOWDER HEAD and her husband. They look a little sweaty. It must have been a good fencing lesson. Even the older of the two children knows something terrible is about to happen because she runs and hides in the other room. Me on the other hand greet them with smiles and eye the bag in her husband’s hand. It’s rum. I haven’t drank in a couple days and tomorrow is Friday, why not.
Hours later……I’m trying to keep up with CHOWDER HEAD. The bottle of rum is almost gone and I think CHOWDER HEAD is starting to slur her words. Oh I love it when she does that. Her Husband walks in and tells her the rum is gone. CHOWDER HEAD, “It’s time to go hoomme.”
Of course at this point the evil voices in my head say, “What no more rum. Let’s make a rum run. It’s only……Oh shit….It’s time to go to bed.”
This is why I thank the Espresso gods for putting a coffee stand on every corner in the dear city I live in. And I equally thank the Bagel gods for providing free bagels at the office on Friday mornings. If it wasn’t for these two things I would have succumb to voice #1. I'm still contemplating giving in to Voice #3 .